I feel validated :) :( :/ :S

My camera is MIA again so in the mean time I wanted to ask all you Wise Women what you think about validating your childrens' feelings. I was recently at a conference and there was a focus on this topic and I never really thought about it but now I'm intrigued.
I grew up in a home where I was told if someone offended me, GET OVER IT. If I'm just having a bad day, GET OVER IT. If my sister made me mad and called me a fat piece of crap, GET OVER IT. Basically I wasn't allowed to have a bad day and if I did I was supposed to keep it to myself and fake everyone out that it was the best day ever!!Do I feel like this made me a recluse, confused, unable to own my feelings and control them?Quite the opposite.

I am actually very grateful that my parents took this approach with me. I feel like I don't waste a lot of time trying to decide if so or so meant offense and how I am going to deal with that. I just GET OVER IT. There's a lot more time to be happy when you aren't worrying about being worried.
And lets be honest, who enjoys being with someone who is constantly down or saying negative things about themselves or others and how someone offended them (again!!)? I sure don't. It makes me want to say just GET OVER IT!! So what if that person said/did/meant that?? Are you really going to let it ruin your day when chances are they didn't even mean it that way? I guess some people just need the drama...
So you can imagine my surprise when I was told that I need to sit my child down every time he throws a tantrum or says he's mad about something or at someone or someone hurt his feelings and talk out his feelings with him. Doesn't the regular practice of exploring one's feelings make one an emotional hypochondriac?? Isn't it so much easier and, well, happier, just being happy? I get that its not easy just getting over every negative thing in your life, and sometime its not even possible without professional help, but in the little day to day crisis' isn't it just better to try to GET OVER IT?
Unfortunately, the just GET OVER IT method isn't working so hot with my almost-3-year-old. So I'm thinking maybe the feelings validating method might be the answer.

Here are some pros of validating I see:

1. it helps children and parents understand the real emotion and issue.
2. the child is more honest and open.
3. they take responsibility for their emotions so they can fix it.

I feel I have already discussed the cons. Which brings me to one more point. Although I think the GET OVER IT method worked great for me as a child and I still apply it to myself when I'm feeling particularly irked or offended about something (gretchen, your over-reacting. Just GET OVER IT and salvage the rest of your day) but I need my husband to validate my feelings. When he has said or done something to hurt me I expect him to own up to it and apologize. I think marriage would be the worse if spouses didn't validate each other's feelings. And if we expect our feelings to be validated, don't you think our children deserve our validation as well? Isn't that the respectful and appropriate thing to do in a family?
So, if I haven't totally confused and offended you yet, I want to know what YOU think about all this. Do you think its better to validate your children's feelings or just GET OVER IT? And why? Are there certain circumstances that would call for one or the other? How were you raised and what has worked in your own homes with your children?? Feel free to throw out suggestions, stories, theories, threats for offending you (at me only please), opinions...I look forward to hearing your thoughts!

Mama's living room make-over

My Madre has been wanting to do something about her family room. Something a little more organized. Something a little more her and a little less did-ten-kids-and-a-dog-just-run-through-here-and-dump-all-their-belongings?they-did?I-can-tell.

So true to Gretchen Form I decided to repaint the walls and trim. And my mom has been wanting to paint the kitchen a soft, happy yellow so we decided to do that too while we were at it. We picked out a lovely  tan/light brown to paint the walls and a crisp white as an accent for the trim. I couldn't be more thrilled with how it all turned out. My Mommy says she loves it too...I sure hope so! HUGE thanks to my Sisters for all their help!! It would have taken me ions to do it all myself!

Dang I have the cutest sisters!! Even when they're all grody from painting and sweating for a week. Amazing.

Ready. Set. Reveal!

Oh my Geez!! I have the cutest Padre EVER!

See this Ugly Sucker??

Amazing how happy a little paint can make someone!
Now I know it wasn't just the fumes cuz I'm still happy :)

This armoir that's housing the TV is the only thing besides paint supplies that we bought for the makeover.  Are you crushing on it as much as I am??! The excellent condition of the wood is beautiful. The details of the molding says, "I'm upscale". The incredible storage space made it a must have (I wish I had taken a picture of it...there's another cabinet inside the bottom cabinets, so its double layered. Holds TONS of DVDs, VHS's, and CDs), but the price is what made this beauty irresistible. Are you ready for it? Wait for it...............................
...................................
...................................
50 BUCKS!
Yup. It was a killer craigslist find. Oh craigslist, how I love thee!!
So the total cost of the room: $60 in paint
                                                                   $20 for paint rollers
                                                         $50 for armoir
Total cost of makeover: $130
The look of satisfaction and appreciation on my Mother's face: Priceless

I love your junk.

I never was a yard-saler until this year. Boy have I been missing out! You can get things dirt cheap (yeah, even free! Can't beat that!) and its not all junk. In fact garage sale items are a lot like people. Most of it has been well used but is still fully functionable...just a little scratched up. But with a lot of spit and polish and a little love and adoration that old used item can look young and fresh again! (Ok...horrible analogy.)

Here are some of my finds from the past two weeks and what I've done to help those people items look their best.

This sad ugly mirror was screaming for attention so I took it home

and dressed it up in white spray paint and some big fabric rosettes. It is very happy now and feeling at home in my entry way. And its got my back making sure nothings running down my face or frizzing off my head when I'm off to somewhere important where I need to impress. Like Winco.

I found this glass plate and cup and had seen some inspiration I knew I wanted to try. Totally worth the 25 cents.
Paint the cup and bottom of the plate (don't paint the top, it makes it hard to wash off!) and let it dry a few hours. Then glue the cup to the plate (I used Gorilla glue) and then stick some dictionaries on top and let it sit over night. Then stack delicious things on top.

I have a giant plain jane wall in my kitchen that wasn't being utilized. This hook thing was the perfect solution . It still had the $13 tag on it and I snagged it for a buck. I spray painted it white and there it hangs displaying my favorite aprons. I just started this wall yesterday so its not finished...I'm thinking move the left apron over and add a thick white framed chalkboard under the hooks? Yes, I think so. 

I've been collecting picture frames for awhile now so I could make a photo wall in my bedroom. Its done now but I couldn't get any good pics so I'll post about that later. But here's my Main Man Helper that took all the garage sale tags off and sprayed window cleaner on them for me (I previously spray painted them). For all you who have 3 year old helpers you know how helpful they can be. Like they totally re-define helper.

I admit. He is worth every penny. 

I have always wanted a little reading nook in my bedroom but in the past have barely had room for our bed. Finally a little reading space! And this $7 chair was just what I was looking for. It was in perfect condition but yes, I spray-painted it white. Watch out kids! I might just spray paint you next!

You can catch a glimpse of my photo wall! This is not complete either. I want to put some white floater shelves above the chair for those books I'm going to read while I cozy up in my new reading chair.


Well that's all folks! I have a few more items in my garage that are just waiting to be sanded and painted. Cute things. I can hardly wait to get on those projects!
Do you love or hate yard sales?? I've been on both ends of the fence but I'm discovering the potential behind
 1)You can't go wrong with solid wood furniture. It can be sanded, refinished, painted and made to look like new. Just don't get the imitation wood laminate or plywood unless you don't plan on doing anything with it. Not the best to paint and you can't sand it.
2) Make sure its in workable condition...meaning you can make it look good again. No cracks, tears, stains (if you're not going to cover it in new fabric or paint), or weak joints that you can't fix.
3) Go yard-saling with an idea of what you need and then find things that can be a solution. If you just go to see what you can find you might get something too big, too small, or impractical for your needs. Then you end up just storing junk. No fun!
4) Lots of people price items higher than they expect to sell it for because people tend to haggle (is that even a word??) at yard sales so don't be afraid to offer a few bucks less than the tag says. Unless the item is only 2 bucks. Then try to add a few other items and take a few bucks off it all :)

I'm not claiming to be an expert yard-saler or anything (although that is what I want to be when I grow up) but these pointers have helped me get a little more bang for my cents buck.

Did you go yard-saling this weekend?? What did you score? 

Got 20?

See this meal?

That there took about 20 minutes. I kid you not. And pictures never do justice to food...this stuff was A to the MAZING!! It was basically my version of hawaiian pork but without all the grease creating a pool for the rest of your food to bath in. Hawaiian food makes me feel sick but Kiel loves it so I made this as a greaseless alternative and the taste was perty darn perfect. And yes, it took a total of 20 minutes. OK! Here's how this puppys done.

You need:

  approximately 3 LBS pork roast (I just got the cheapo one and it couldn't have been tastier)

a can of root beer or pepsi (I used pepsi since thats what we had on hand)

Salt n Pepper

Put a skillet on the stove and turn the temp to med-high. Pour a few tsp of oil and get it nice and hot. Then place your roast in the oil and sear the sides of the roast. This should just take a few minutes. You don't want to cook the meat, just turn the sides nice and brown quickly...it holds in the flavor and juices since you will be crock potting (is that a word?) this.

Put the seared roast into your crock pot and turn it on low. Pour the can of soda over the meat and cover. Now go to church or work or something for about 6 hours while the roast cooks. Take the roast out and shred it. Place the meat back in the liquid and cook for one more hour. The liquid should be gone at this point leaving very moist shredded pork. Add salt and pepper to flavor. Because Hawaiian pork is generally pretty salty, I added quite a bit of salt...I don't measure (sorry folks) but it was like a tsp...just taste it. If it needs more, add more.

Preheat oven to 400. Rough chop an onion (or two) and some red potatoes. Place them on a cookie sheet and drizzle olive oil, oregano, rosemary, salt and pepper over them and stir them a little so they are evenly coated. Place cookie sheet in oven and these are done when your rice is done...about 20 minutes.

Put your rice on to cook. I cook mine on the stove but if you're a rice-cooker person then whatev. It takes about 20 mins either way.

20 minutes later everything is done cooking and you have a ridiculously easy, fast, delicious- as in seriously delicious- hot meal. 

Oh, and there was still some left over so the next day I warmed it up and stuck it on a bun and added some bbq sauce. Ohminagoota. It was just as good as it was the night before. So make some extra.

Note to self: measure ingredients in the future for blogging purposes...

DIY Laundry detergent

Hows that for a creative title?? I know...I'm just awesome like that.

So my smarty-pants sister called me up the other day and told me about this fantastic laundry soap she made. It smells soooo good and works like a charm for less than 5 cents a load i was told. Um...hello?! I need this in my life!! And then, like awesome things usually do, DIY laundry soap started popping up all over pinterest, in girl chats, in my dreams, on TV, ...ok not really on TV but just about everywhere else. I decided to give it a try. And surprisingly I didn't feel at all like a pioneer or one of the characters on Little House On the Prairie like I thought I would...instead I felt sexy, modern, and incredibly smart. Ha. Try this stuff...its super easy, fast, and cheap. Oh, and it smells just as awesome as it works. WIN.

Here's how this amazingness is done. You need these 3 things- all of which can be found right next to each other in your regular ol grocery store. I bought mine at Winco. Total it equaled out to be about 6 bucks and you only use a little of the Borax and baking soda...so this will make like a lifetime worth of laundry soap. For around 6 bucks. Pinch yourself...this is real.

I hate fuzzy pictures too...here's to crappy cameras. I am open to camera fund donations...

 Freeze the bar of Fels-Naptha for a few hours so its nice and hard...this will make it much easier to work with. 

PS. This is so not my freezer...I borrowed it from a friend so ya'll wouldn't be jealous that your freezer isn't nice and organized and clean like mine...or something like that...

 Smash your frozen bar of Fels-naptha so it blends easier. If you have a super blender this step is unnecessary.

Turn the fels-naptha into powder. This stuff smells like a cotton field on a sunny day and who doesn't want to smell like that??

Measure 1 cup of Borax {notice the awesome things its going to do to your clothes!}

Measure 1 cup of Arm and Hammer Super Washing Soda (not to be confused with baking soda! ;)

 Mix the 3 ingredients together and, that's right, your done. And its been like 3 minutes since you started making soap and you didn't break a sweat. Amazing right?!

And not to be shallow or anything, but doesn't my new little soap holder look so much better than that monster tub of laundry detergent?? Love space savers!

And the best part (besides it being easy, cheap, and affordable)? it only takes 1 tablespoon per load. 2 tablespoons if your kids pooped through 3 layers of clothes or your husband slid into home base to impress you. This stuff goes a long ways.

 So go put these 3 ingredients on your shopping list and make some!! You'll never go back to Tide. Or maybe you will...but I am seriously satisfied with mine. 

K. Peace out girl scouts.

No-sew Pleated Lampshade Cover

Remember back in the day when I posted this picture and said I wanted get a smaller lamp and replace that big green picture with two smaller ones?

Well it has been done. I found a cute little base that was a hideously outdated gold and tan color but hey, it was 3 bucks. So I took that sucker home and spray painted it a glossy red. Oh yes I did. And its currently my new favorite thing. I looked around for the perfect lampshade to go with it but having been spoiled with a 3 dolla lamp base I wasn't about to go spend 6x that price on the lampshade! So (lightbulb moment) I decided to buy a shade and cover it! Bril. I found a plain ol white IKEA shade at the thrift store for 2 dollas. The sides were bent up a little but it was going to get covered up anyway. At this point I was very happy with life.

Until I realized that there are like NO tutorials on covering a cone-ish shape lampshade. Turns out everyone else is smart and buys a drum shade so its a simple matter of gluing straight across. Not me. I love a good challenge. OK I really just didn't think about it but turns out, its really not that bad! 

I give you:

Here's the naked lampshade (before it got dressed up):

You can't see it very well in this picture, but there were quite a few dents all the way around it. So I went to Joanns and got 1/2 yard of  fabric. 

First, I folded over the edge and hot glued one long side and the two short sides, leaving one long side raw.

This is how I folded it down and glued it. Simple.

After I got the three sides glued down, I turned my lampshade upside down so the top of the shade was sitting on the table. You will first glue the fabric to the bottom of the shade. So start with the edge pf the shade furthest away from you so you can see what your doing. Hold the fabric to the shade so the fold is towards you. Once you fold your fabric over the shade and glue it down the fabric will look like a finished edge.

Glue away! Slowly working your way around the lamp base...

Once you get the fabric glued all the way around the base flip the lamp back up so the base is on the table. Take the two short sides of the fabric and glue them up the side of the lamp so it looks like this:

Then pull rest of the fabric up tight over the top and cut all the way around leaving about 2 inches of fabric over the top shade rim.

After you get the top trimmed up fold the raw edge down and glue it just like you did the other three sides in the beginning.

Then, starting at the place where you glued the two short sides up the side of the shade, glue the underlapping piece of fabric onto the inside edge of the shade. Then grab another piece of fabric and over lap it slightly onto the piece you just glued down and then glue the new piece down. Continue this all the way around the lamp. (sorry, this part is kind of hard to explain but it makes more sense when you're actually looking at it)

I know this looks long and complicated but its really not. It took me about 45 minutes start to finish and I had no idea what I was doing. But I love how it turned out and it looks so much better.

After you finish all the overlapping and gluing you are done!! Do your happy dance! You now have a lampshade that is screaming (or whispering) your style. That feels good. And you can do the whole thing for a few bucks. You could also add embellishments like flowers, trim, lace, Oooooh the possibilities! If you redo one of yours send me a pic and we'll do a happy dance together! 

Side Table

We have a six car garage that is packed with my little (and big) projects waiting for a coat of paint, a part, a wipe down, a few screws, you name it. So I am so thrilled to announce that I finally finished one of my projects! Although this project has been sitting in my house and turning the corner where it sat into a dark, sad corner. The dark wood of the side table next to the black marble fireplace was just too gloomy. I needed to brighten it up! And the price was mega right. We inherited this table when we moved into our condo so that was $0...cha ching! Its very a high quality table from Crate and Barrel but it has definitely seen better days. The edges were pretty banged up and there's a nice long scratch down the side.

So what did I do?? I pulled out my spray paint of course and brightened things up!

First I took off the knob and gave this puppy 2 layers of primer since it had a glossy finish. Then I spray painted it with some Rustoleum (my personal fave) in gloss and I painted the shelf in teal that I mixed up from several different colors I had laying around. Then I used denatured alcohol and 0000 steel wool to antique it. After that I lightly glazed it with some black tinted glaze to bring out some of the cracks and crevices. Finally, I covered it with a coat of polyurethane in semi-gloss. 

The final result has me swooning.  

Leave it to me to leave a bright pink computer case in the picture. dangit.

 It bightened up that corner like you would not believe!! 

 This basket was already being used in here to hold my ridiculous amounts of magazines. I just can't help subscribing to every home decor and health magazine out there when its only $3 for a year! (Black Friday deals my friends;)

 Did you want all the details??

I love the dramatic effect of the dark wood showing around the corners and accenting lines.

 I stole this pair of birds from my bro's wedding reception and they have since lived all over my house. They complete this vignette perfectly =)

`

Hurrah for checking projects off the list and loving the final product! Next on my list to do with that area, find a different lamp- something a little shorter and maybe round and shiny and black :) and then take down the current picture and replace it with two square colorful pictures. Too bad you can't do everything in one day right??

Anyone else finish some fun/necessary projects over the weekend??